


Fake Girlfriend, Real Date

by CatrinaSL



Series: Three Things [14]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Background Steve/CHOOSE YOUR OWN SHIP, Bets & Wagers, Elf on the Shelf, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Kiss, Flirting, Kissing, McDonald's ketchup packet, Penguin coffee mug, Pizza, SHIP DARCY LEWIS WITH ALL THE THINGS, Three Things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-17 06:19:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13070910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatrinaSL/pseuds/CatrinaSL
Summary: Bucky and Darcy are fake dating to take the attention of the Avengers betting pool off Steve's personal life. They don't have any feelings for each other. At all.





	Fake Girlfriend, Real Date

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kali588](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kali588/gifts).



> For Kali588, who requested Elf on the Shelf, McDonald's ketchup packet, Penguin coffee mug.

Bucky opened the door to his apartment after a late night workout and froze.

There was someone in his kitchen. At two am.

The knife he kept tucked away appeared in his hand, and he stalked into the other room, spotting the person with their head stuck in his fridge.

He paused just before throwing the knife; her penguin coffee mug was on the counter, and he sagged against the door frame in relief.

"Darcy."

She gasped and banged her head on the freezer door. "Oh my god! You scared me half to death!"

"It's a popular feeling tonight," Bucky agreed. "What are you doing here?"

Darcy shut the refrigerator and hopped onto the counter, reaching for her coffee cup. "Fake booty call?" she told him. "If I'm all 'walk of shame,' even if it's early, I have no doubt you and I will pull ahead in the pool."

"Is that really necessary?" Bucky asked, stowing the knife. "I think Tony has forgotten Steve exists by now, with the way you were looking at me in the lab this afternoon."

"Could be," Darcy replied, swinging her legs. "But a little more couldn't hurt, could it? And maybe it's a good thing I'm here. As your fake secret girlfriend, I have to say I'm concerned about you. There is nothing in this kitchen to eat. I already threw away the  _ very _ expired eggs. The only thing left is a McDonald's ketchup packet. And for some freaky reason, an Elf on the Shelf in the freezer."

"Clint," Bucky explained, and Darcy nodded in understanding.

"So what  _ do _ you eat?" she wanted to know.

Bucky shrugged. "I eat at Steve's. When he's not with his actual secret special someone. And takeout. You have no idea how good New York pizza tastes after a couple decades on ice."

"What's the best place?"

"Huh?"

"New York pizza. Who do you think makes the best?"

"Did you just come here to get me to feed you?" Bucky asked.

Darcy tried to look innocent and failed. "Maybe?"

He smiled and walked into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. "So this isn't a fake booty call," he said, turning to face her. "It's a  _ real _ date."

"No way," she claimed. "I in no way have developed feelings for you, fake significant other."

"Sure," Bucky agreed, watching her legs swing and wondering how she'd react if he grabbed her ankle. He looked back up at her face, and suddenly knew exactly what would happen.

"But I mean... hypothetically... if I had? If... if this  _ was _ a real date? Would you order me the best New York pizza?"

Bucky smirked. "Honey, if this were a real date, I'd get you whatever you wanted."

Darcy bit her lip and set her coffee mug down so that she could hop off the counter. "I wasn't trying to distract Tony from Steve's relationship status in the lab today," she confessed. "I didn't even realize I was... looking at you."

"Well, you were," he told her. "There were some definite signals being sent."

"What kind of signals?" Darcy asked.

Bucky shrugged. "The only decent pizza places open at this time of night are dollar-a-slice joints. We’d have to go out. Do you want to do that?"

Darcy shook her head without taking her eyes off his face.

"What  _ do _ you want, then?" he asked, stepping closer to her.

Darcy answered him with a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> [Prompt a Three Things fic!](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSf7S2MbkK0CxVHMG3kF8CD6fYqD0zwY-J6MqLb21nmFyRpE4w/viewform)
> 
> [Reblog on tumblr](http://catrinasl.tumblr.com/post/168730535093/fake-girlfriend-real-date)
> 
> Tumblr: [catrinasl](http://catrinasl.tumblr.com)
> 
> Twitter: [@Catrina_SL](http://twitter.com/Catrina_SL)


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